Letter to a prospective suitor: a lesson on white male prvilege

When you contacted me earlier this summer I rejected your invitation, but you’ve persisted in this pursuit. 

Perhaps you need clarification.

Did you read the entirety of my response, or just the part that turned you on? I am not a domme, and I don’t want to play pretend domme.  What part of “deal with your own privilege issues” did you not get?  Your performance of privilege as a White man gets in the way of finding a Black woman in the BDSM scene, but you clearly do not care about resolving that issue because you do not empathize with anyone who does not share your status or privilege with regard to race, class, and gender.  You don’t seem to interested in engaging in kink with a Black woman in a way that shows and encourages mutual respect and dignity between consenting adults.  Rather, you have constructed a virtual landscape that reveals your contempt and anger towards Black women because of your inability to surpass your limits as a person with privileged status—yes, your performance of privileged status limits your ability to transform your life and build loving, lasting relationships with your woman of preference.

Your profile picture featuring a Black woman’s pair of feet being used to cover your face sends a clear message to me that you view Black women as sexual accessories for your entertainment.  Her face does not exist—just her feet.  You, on the other hand, need not show your face in that image because your skin color does not invoke accessory status—it invokes dominance and supremacy.  White male privilege as an ideology encourages such fetishization of women of color as playthings.  Your invitations further indicate your inability to view and treat Black women with respect and dignity as full human beings who are equal to you.  You would rather put Black women into mythological constructs for your own entertainment.  As such, you don’t seem to be interested in matters of the heart in a manner that would help or heal. 

Further, based on your proposed scenarios, you seem to be interested in invoking much more destructive emotions like rage and bitterness.  Why would you expect me to pretend to be a hateful, greedy, vengeful person, or worse, pretend to be self-centered and oblivious to others who are different from me?  You seem to think that the only way for you to dismantle your privilege is to pretend being oppressed opposite me pretending to be privileged.  Why not work on dismantling your gender and race privilege from within so that you can participate in a much more transformative and progressive process of social justice as a part of a much larger collective? 

Or is that an impossible course of action because of your socioeconomic status and your narcissism? 

You clearly don’t like being told no.  In fact, you clearly refuse to accept it.  As a person with gold status you don’t accept rejection because you believe yourself and people who share your status to be the only people that matter.   Your politics as a progressive do not give you a free pass on your privilege issues.  Claiming to be a progressive while treating me and other women of color as commodities with no right to give or not give consent just makes you a much more stealth predator.  In such a world-view like that, people like me are tools and toys to use and discard.  I suspect that your everyday dealings with us are less than honorable or respectful. 

You are attempting to impose your presence in my life by topping from the bottom, but you.  I don’t need that headache in my life.  I’m not your personal guru for your spiritual path.   I’m not your magical Negro or mammy. 

The answer is yet again no.

— 6 hours ago
Daywalker. (at University of the District of Columbia)

Daywalker. (at University of the District of Columbia)

— 1 day ago
"But suppose God is black? What if we go to Heaven and we, all our lives, have treated the Negro as an inferior, and God is there, and we look up and He is not white? What then is our response?"
Robert Kennedy (via revenge-of-socrates)

(via blackandwoman)

— 2 days ago with 183 notes
nicohammill:

WHAT ARE YOUR HANDS UP FOR?
Poster to support protests in Ferguson, MO which are demanding justice for the murder of Michael Brown, an unarmed black youth, by local policeman Darren Wilson who, over 10 days later, has yet to face any consequences for his crimes.
Nico Hammill

nicohammill:

WHAT ARE YOUR HANDS UP FOR?

Poster to support protests in Ferguson, MO which are demanding justice for the murder of Michael Brown, an unarmed black youth, by local policeman Darren Wilson who, over 10 days later, has yet to face any consequences for his crimes.

Nico Hammill

(via blackandwoman)

— 2 days ago with 64 notes
lilyanfey:

Solidarity protest in Peoria, IL. I feel lost and hopeless.

lilyanfey:

Solidarity protest in Peoria, IL. I feel lost and hopeless.

(via blackandwoman)

— 2 days ago with 93 notes
"…racism is not simply personal prejudice/bigotry that only manifests in the form of being unkind to someone on the basis of their skin color or calling them a derogatory name. Racism is a system of oppression, one that creates a society of first- and second-class citizens by denying rights and access to resources to non-white people. Racism is a system of power created by and maintained through public policy. Racist rhetoric or action is anything that reinforces/upholds that system."
Mychal Denzel Smith (via checkprivilege) It’s the systemic, institutional part that makes racism not only extremely oppressive to those who are targeted and labelled as inferior, but deadly, if not by bullets or ropes, then by unsustainable living conditions, including PTSD-related physical and mental illnesses. Welcome to Hell on Earth.

(via blackandwoman)

— 2 days ago with 77 notes
oreeoriginol:

In October of 2013, Andy Lopez who was just 13 years old was shot to death by Sonoma County Sheffis Deputy Erick Gelhaus. Andy was walking to a friends house carrying a toy gun designed to look like an AK-47. After being spotted by the police, they stopped and told him to drop his gun. Without allowing him enough time to properly react to the deputy’s orders, Andy was shot 7 times killing him atthe scene. It has been revealed that the deputy, Erick Gelhaus has a history of using excessive force and the Sonoma County Sheriff’s office was aware of it. He is also a firearms instructor who has been accused of having “racist and extremist tendencies and beliefs”. Last week Andy Lopez would of celebrated his 14th birthday. Instead, his family continues to fight for justice. There is an epidemic happening in our streets where police officers continue to criminalize and terrorize our black and brown community members. Continue to demand that the DA prosecute Sheriff Deputy Erick Gelhaus for his crime. PLEASE SHARE!!!!!

oreeoriginol:

In October of 2013, Andy Lopez who was just 13 years old was shot to death by Sonoma County Sheffis Deputy Erick Gelhaus. Andy was walking to a friends house carrying a toy gun designed to look like an AK-47. After being spotted by the police, they stopped and told him to drop his gun. Without allowing him enough time to properly react to the deputy’s orders, Andy was shot 7 times killing him atthe scene. It has been revealed that the deputy, Erick Gelhaus has a history of using excessive force and the Sonoma County Sheriff’s office was aware of it. He is also a firearms instructor who has been accused of having “racist and extremist tendencies and beliefs”. Last week Andy Lopez would of celebrated his 14th birthday. Instead, his family continues to fight for justice. There is an epidemic happening in our streets where police officers continue to criminalize and terrorize our black and brown community members. Continue to demand that the DA prosecute Sheriff Deputy Erick Gelhaus for his crime. PLEASE SHARE!!!!!

(via scifi-fantasist)

— 2 days ago with 6028 notes
dorothydandridge:

"The Labor and Industry Committee of the Los Angeles Branch of the NAACP salutes you for once again proving that you are not only a pretty and highly talented entertainer, but as well a dedicated and courageous freedom fighter and all around good citizen. Your support of our protest action against the Jim Crow Washington Redskins added immeasurably to the success of our efforts." - the NAACP in a letter to the Los Angeles Sentinel praising Dorothy Dandridge for canceling her performance during halftime of a football game between the Washington Redskins and the Los Angeles Rams.

dorothydandridge:

"The Labor and Industry Committee of the Los Angeles Branch of the NAACP salutes you for once again proving that you are not only a pretty and highly talented entertainer, but as well a dedicated and courageous freedom fighter and all around good citizen. Your support of our protest action against the Jim Crow Washington Redskins added immeasurably to the success of our efforts." - the NAACP in a letter to the Los Angeles Sentinel praising Dorothy Dandridge for canceling her performance during halftime of a football game between the Washington Redskins and the Los Angeles Rams.

(via blackandwoman)

— 2 days ago with 104 notes
Hell will freeze over before I let racists and haters silence me’ … Malorie Blackman. Photograph: Christian Sinibaldi for the Guardian (via Malorie Blackman faces racist abuse after call to diversify children’s books | Books | theguardian.com) Now I want to read everything she’s written!

Hell will freeze over before I let racists and haters silence me’ … Malorie Blackman. Photograph: Christian Sinibaldi for the Guardian (via Malorie Blackman faces racist abuse after call to diversify children’s books | Books | theguardian.com) Now I want to read everything she’s written!

— 2 days ago with 1 note
saltysojourn:

Huda Sha’arawi (1879 - 1947) was a well-known Muslim feminist from Egypt and the founder of Egyptian Feminist Union. At the time, women were expected to confine themselves to the home and wear the hijab as a sign of modesty and respect. Her education and experiences led her to reject these social norms, which she believed operated to restrict to keep women from being involved in public life. She began organizing lectures and meetings for women as an effort to bring them into public space. Here she stands with two other Egyptian delegates to 1923 Rome Congress of the International Woman Suffrage Alliance, Huda Shaarawi is in the center.  Photo credit: International Museum of Women

saltysojourn:

Huda Sha’arawi (1879 - 1947) was a well-known Muslim feminist from Egypt and the founder of Egyptian Feminist Union. At the time, women were expected to confine themselves to the home and wear the hijab as a sign of modesty and respect. Her education and experiences led her to reject these social norms, which she believed operated to restrict to keep women from being involved in public life. She began organizing lectures and meetings for women as an effort to bring them into public space.

Here she stands with two other Egyptian delegates to 1923 Rome Congress of the International Woman Suffrage Alliance, Huda Shaarawi is in the center.

Photo credit: International Museum of Women

— 4 days ago with 3 notes
Texas Court Decides Companies Can Legally Lie To Their Employees →

addictinginfo:

Texas Court Decides Companies Can Legally Lie To Their Employees

goodbye_michael_scott

image via VIP fan auctions

If Mitt Romney is right and corporations are in fact people my friend, then they are definitely the kind you don’t want showing up at your parties.

The highest court in…

— 4 days ago with 172 notes